Flak Attack

If it’s in the news, the Flak attacks!

Posts Tagged ‘Henry Louis Gates

POTUS Beer Run: This Bud’s not quite for you

leave a comment »

Nice. It even has a logo. (Not really)

Nice. It even has a logo. (Not really)

So “Beer Summit 2009” took place in the back of the White House last night.

You know, I’m sure Barack Obama put out the Chex mix, peanuts and badly cooked Vienna sausages to give it that feel from “Cheers.”

And so we have the President, Dr. Gates and Sgt. Crowleyand Veep Biden (?!) … all hanging out like a bunch of guys on a weekend pass fresh on the heels of some Amway convention.

Just look at them. How staged was this dumb thing? It’s been in the news for more than week and there’s not even a pool table or a jukebox blaring “All My Exes Live in Texas.” What gives?

Evidently “Happy Hour” wasn’t so happy. Sad, you try to get a few dudes together to play beer pong and quarters and now the Congress and national media get involved. No fun. And spin control at its finest. Yawn.

As if the outdoor-lounging, suit-wearing, Biden-interrupted toast to nothing was bad enough, we have another national debate sparked out of what beer should be shotgunned… er, sipped out on the White House lawn.

In a letter to Obama dated Wednesday, Massachusetts Rep. Richard Neal strongly urges the president not to drink Budweiser, now owned by a Belgian company. Nor should the White House consider serving Miller or Coors, Neal writes, both owned by a United Kingdom conglomerate.

This country’s deficit is going the way of U.S. War Bonds, swine flu is killing everyone but pigs and then there’s that government-run health care idea, and this is what this tool thinks is most important?! Shilling for the president to slurp on a Sam Adams?!

So, for those dunderheads keeping score at home:

POTUS: Bud Light
VPOTUS: Bucklers
Gates: Sam Adams Light
Crowley: Blue Moon

And after the round of suds, what happened? Did Crowley show Gates more moves he learned at the police academy, slamming his grill in the rose bushes outside? Did Gates get so hammered, he began giving Obama nuggies? Did Biden… well, he always looks that way. Nevermind.

Let’s put the brakes on this ridiculous news cycle, everyone. Back to running the country. Places!

Written by theflak

July 31, 2009 at 9:06 am

POTUS Beer Run?

leave a comment »

Recently, the leader of the free world overstepped his boundaries just a skosh when he decided to comment on the Dr. Henry Louis Gates’ plight of being arrested at his own house for breaking and entering.

This arrest sparked yet another tired debate on police ethics, racism and what is and is not the business of the federal government.

You know, your typical week in America. (Sigh.)

Evidently, the good doctor flared a little attitude when asked for I.D. (understandably so) at his own crib and the cop was fueled by a 911 call. MEMO to the police, the caller said “suitcase”, not “race.” Just sayin’.

Anywhoo.

President Obama spent 55.5 minutes discussing health care policy for an entire nation. Good stuff for a headline, but he was thrown a ticking time bomb that blew up in his face for the last 4.5 minutes of that news conference.

“Mr. President, care to comment on Dr. Gates’ arrest?”

Come on 2012! Woohoo!

Come on 2012! Woohoo!

It doesn’t matter what was asked. That statement was in slow motion, SPOTUS Gibbs was in the back slicing his wrists as the result has now been dubbed… “HenryLouis-Gate” (cute, right).

What everyone does know is the police officer apparently acted “stupidly.” Doh!

Much ado about nothing ensued causing a national upheaval and one large presidential wedgie of his now-heralded Mom pants.

Being the casual, laissez-faire kind of cat, Obama decides to do what all presidents would do in this situation – make it worse by offering diplomacy on tap.

That’s right. This week, both Dr. Henry Louis Gates and Cambridge Police Sgt. James Crowley will walk up to the bar at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue for Happy Hour and a nice cold one. Just us guys.

Sweet. Stupidly. And evidently at Crowley’s behest?

Mr. Obama phoned Crowley, who suggested the three men sit down for a beer at the White House. The president said he liked the idea, and Gates reportedly concurred when Mr. Obama phoned him next.

Man, if it is that easy to influence an executive order, I need to make a phone call or blog my man about these pesky tax returns. Maybe, we solve our grievances over a dollar store visit or something.

Hey, uh, your royal exuberance? Call me.

Written by theflak

July 30, 2009 at 10:00 am