Flak Attack

If it’s in the news, the Flak attacks!

Posts Tagged ‘lead story

The Spin View: Hillary dances the Congo line

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Like the Lone Ranger racing on the plains busting Silver and her “High Hos,” former president Bill Clinton galloped on some North Korean tarmac, met with Kim Jong Il and traded two captured U.S. reporters for two sweet Cuban cigars and a stained dress.

Evidently, while Hilary was showing off the latest U.S. fashions in pant suits, yet another version of the Jerry Springer show broke out during her presser in the Congo, as seen here:

Nevermind all the kitschy “Lost in Translation” headlines (originated by the great Jake Tapper) seen internationally, Hillary popped her neck, snapped those fingers and told the Congo dude asking about President Obama what’s up.

Gurl, no, you di’nt!

Don’t believe me? Rewind the video and watch her get that gangsta lean on. The way she flops back in the chair after she gesticulates all over the front row because she thought someone had the nerve to ask Hillary about her hubby and his jet setting trip.

“You want me to tell you what my husband thinks?”

That was the beginning of the end. That one blue vein pulsing in her forehead and what little of a smile she quickly was erased by her fangs. As. If?!

“My husband is not secretary of state, I am,” she replied. “If you want my opinion I will tell you my opinion. I am not going to be channeling my husband.”

Keep it classy there, Madame Secretary.

Does that shadow darken more than the sun always shining on your broad shoulder pads? Looks like it may be your legacy in politics unless there is a PR campaign revving up soon to correct this angst and envy of Captain Charisma.

During his sinful ways and non-sexual-relations-with-that-woman, Hillary kept her cool. While he was being probed by every national network in the U.S., she was steadfast by his side.

But now that she’s got the title and he’s some washed-up has-been, his shadow still looms and now she would like to get it all out. The real problem is if some student with a haphazard translator can make her square off that easy, what happens when some starched-shirt GOP acolyte confronts her when she is back stateside?

She going to shank him? Scratch his eyes out. Man up, Hillary. Come on. Who’s the good secretary of state?

Remember what they say, “Smile, and the world smiles with you. Fart… and, well, watch the video.”

Walter Cronkite: And that’s the way it was

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Without a doubt, there will be memorials into perpetuity because this brilliant reporter and sage of the airwaves was finally overcome by his illnessesand there should be.

Walter CronkiteHowever, what’s lacking is Walter Cronkite’s legacy upon those talking heads giving the homage to the iconic CBS veteran.

This was “the most trusted man in America” for decades, and today, who in the world would allow a single news anchor to even babysit their kids?!

National news is pathetic regardless of where your TV remote finds you. There is no joint broadcasting, tiered openness or unleavened bias anymore. One network touts our president as “sort of God” and the other may as well accuse him of being Rosemary’s Baby.

Long gone are the days when you can turn on an evening news report and rest assured with all the facts to know that’s the way it is.

You know if the Edward R. Murrow disciples these days want to show any respect to Cronkite, consider this: the greatest tribute they can pay him is actually broadcast like him.

Whether you were old enough to see it live, or had a professor show you in school, most of us flacks have seen the regaled Cronkite announcement of JFK’s death.

You couldn’t tell if he was a gun-totin’ member of the GOP or a tree-hugging member of the Democratic Party. Why? It didn’t matter. He was there to report the news, not opine on political dissuasion.

Cronkite was the progeny of a soon-to-be extinct breed – trusted news anchors who valued integrity on facts rather getting hits on Facebook because of their misguided conjecture.

No, now you have to sift through the empty rhetoric, political bent and flat-out mudslinging to get any “facts” these days.

Godspeed, Walter. The media has become unceasingly sorrier since you left it. And now that you have left us, so will we become.

And that’s just the way it is.

The Spin View: Hail to the Beef

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Quite often, the media has to unplug the teleprompters and go ad-lib [cue your fave scary music here].

Hairs stand up on the back of necks, loud gulps can be heard in the production room and shivers are felt from the anchor’s desk to the receptionist’s area.

Why? Because the college graduates forget all the perfunctory items of reporting and go all “hooked on phonics” with their thinking patterns.

Now, just to add a monkey wrench to the situation, forget the white Bronco doing 120 mph down the highway.

Let’s pretend it’s something so newsworthy that all networks have to consecutively stop down and report. Oh, I don’t know… like the president of the United States ordering his lunch!?

Yeah, I know. Reporting at its best. Let’s forget the 27 million folks looking for a job, health care so unaffordable people are considering a move to Canada and oh yeah, that whole war thing. Enjoy this from “The Daily Show,” which calls B.S. on MSNBC.

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Written by theflak

May 9, 2009 at 12:41 pm

Stop the Bleeding

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ron-burgundyThere is a mantra in newsrooms across the country that often goes unsaid, but typically is unavoidable, “If it bleeds, it leads.”

There is a reason why those same nestling hubs of action are full of police scanners and not Disney movies – good news does not attract ratings. Because if it did, most news directors would be scouring the want ads.

Car wrecks, drug busts, City Hall squabbles and who’s doing well on American Idol. Now that’s entertainment… and depressing, which is one of the many reasons we see esteemed reporters racing to the PR side of the tracks.

However, from the “It’s about time” department is an article from PR Week showing a sudden new trend in the news – networks asking for “feel-good story pitches.”

You know Armageddon is upon us when assignment editors are pleading with the public to send them tips on Girl Scout bake sales, new puppies for adoption and anonymous donors paying some old lady’s bills.

Granted, these pitches will need to possess a tie to the depressing stuff, like the economy, but it’s a start for hemophiliac news networks, right?

Maybe the next overnight subject matter expert will hail from the corner office of the “Random Acts of Kindness” Foundation? Stranger things have happened.